Send my mouth way down South and kiss my “a....” goodbye.”

Now sometimes when a song gets in my head, it stays there all day long. It doesn’t matter what else might be going on. What I mean is, the next bit of news was about how people were losing lots of money in their 401ks because of the poor economy. And there I was singing that part about “sending my mouth, way down South” and bidding my posterior adieu. Well, maybe the lyric was still applicable to the 401K thing. I guess it’s all about perception.

Maybe I should have been singing that old Johnny Cash song, “Cotton is down to a quarter a pound, and I’’m busted.” But I think my mind was trying to provide me some comic relief.

The very next day I was trying to make a phone call to Chicago to check on my 401K. I kept getting told that I could push certain numbers if I had specific inquiries. And eventually, a robot told me that if I wanted to speak to a warm body, they would try to find me one. They never did. I’m thinking someone must have sold all the warm body parts.

Anyway, I got to thinking about deputy Barney Fife just picking up the telephone and simply saying, “Hello Sara. Would you get me Juanita over at the diner?”

So the rest of the day I was whistling the theme to “The Andy Griffith Show..” And having become very frustrated trying to call Chicago, the character Otis Campbell sort of stuck in my mind for a while.

(Dwain Walden is editor/publisher of The Moultrie Observer, 985-4545. Email: dwain.walden@gaflnews.com.