dwain walden.tif

Dwain Walden is editor and publisher of The Moultrie Observer.

I firmly believe that a sense of humor is a very good thing. I also believe that one should know where the edge is when it comes to practical jokes.

So let’s learn from others’ mistakes.

Just this past week in Montana, a man was killed after he dressed up like Bigfoot and stood in a highway at night.

Now I’m trying to be careful here and not make light of such tragedy because a person was killed. But the incident will in fact draw lots of discussion and commentary. It can’t be avoided.

This fellow had put on a sniper’s garb called a “Ghille suit” which looks a lot like an overcoat made of buffalo grass and moss.

The prankster was hit by two vehicles. According to the news stories out of Montana, there was evidence that the man had been drinking prior to this tragedy. That would certainly fit the story line.

It’s difficult enough to see a man wearing a flannel shirt and khakis in the road at night. Camouflage him, and he’s a goner.

I’ve often thought how dangerous it could be to dress up like one of these alleged creatures and then present yourself just to get reportings of Bigfoot sightings. What I mean is, we are a nation that romances firepower. The chances of someone being out there armed to the teeth and anxious to shoot something are about as good as there being another major political scandal before spring.

Many hoaxes in this regard have been uncovered. Just a few years ago some yahoos here in Georgia even put ground meat in a gorilla suit and tried to pass it off as a Bigfoot. Apparently they had never heard of DNA. It was obvious they were not Phi Beta Kappas.

I just think if people are going to do these kinds of pranks, they should run some worst-case scenarios and ask themselves, “What all could go wrong here?”

Routinely during hunting season we hear of people and animals being mistaken for deer and getting blasted by novice hunters. Imagine the carnage if some people mounted antlers on their hats and ran through the woods. The fact that they were running upright and were wearing plaid sports jackets would do little to save them from being mounted over someone’s fireplace.

Remember: Know where the edge is.

For instance, I would not go into a hillbilly bar in the backwoods of Kentucky and try to sell the patrons a dental plan.

Through the years, I have poked a lot of fun at those people who “search for Bigfoot.” And once I thought I had hit upon a niche market to tap into the “Bigfoot” venue. I was going to sell cameras that were already out of focus when you bought them. But I couldn’t convince any investors on this idea.

I really ticked off a California guy one time after I had written a column pooh pooing the whole concept of Bigfoots. I said “Sasquatch” was an old Indian word that meant “let’s screw with the white man.”

Well, this Bigfoot enthusiast from Modesto emailed me photos of what he claimed were real sightings. When he called to ask if I had received them, I further ruffled his feathers by telling him that one of the monkey suits still had what appeared to be the price tag on it. He got livid...fighting mad. But he was in California. “Nanny nanny boo boo ... you can’t catch me!”

One can go to Google and find all sorts of reports of “monsters” and things that go bump in the night. As Halloween nears, these reports are likely to increase.

Once more, let me say we should learn from others’ mistakes. So this Halloween do not dress up like Bigfoot and go trick-or-treating. Your chances of knocking on the door where the Second Amendment is etched in the doormat are better than even.

(Email: dwain.walden@gaflnews.com)

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