It seems that more and more some folks are looking for novice ways to get married. They depart from the traditional and incorporate other passions into that event.

Recently, a couple got married on a boat ramp in Michigan. William and Vickie tied the knot right there on a 45 degree angle between a cold beer and an Evinrude sign.

Now I’ve read stories where people have been married under water in scuba gear. And there have been couples who said their vows on a pitcher’s mound. And in one instance the ceremony took place on a roller coaster.

“I doooooooooooooooooo!”

So was that a declaration or a question?

I haven’t read yet where two deer hunters have said their vows in a tree stand. And if it hasn’t happened, it might have to do with the fact that they would both be holding guns while saying things like “til death do us part,” which seems just a little contrasty for the situation.

Now some people say that such weddings are “redneck” and can’t be taken seriously — that they are not sacred. (I’ve just noticed that the words sacred and scared are just one transposed letter from being the same.)

Well, in America we have freedoms to do things mostly like we want to do them and make our interpretations as to what is proper and improper.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. The difference between a violin and a fiddle is the guy playing it. The difference between pork barrel and a godsend is the county line, etc.

So I got to thinking about that couple, William and Vickie, who got hitched down at the boat ramp. And I would be remiss to dismiss the metaphor.

Much like a lake or a river, life has its stumps. Sometimes you’re going to lose your best lure on one and sometimes you have to tie off to one and wait out a storm.

And going fishing is much like a marriage in that sometimes things will be going so well you’ll just flat run out of bait. And sometimes all you’ll haul in is an old tennis shoe.

Life, like the water level, has its ups and downs. Sometimes you get hung on an oyster bar and you have to wait for the tide to come back in. That’s where the preacher talks about patience with each other.

Some fishermen go strictly by a fishing calendar. They swear by it. And in marriages, it’s good, especially for the man, to have a calendar marked with special dates like birthdays, anniversaries, Mother’s Day, etc. Now whether they swear by it or at it — I guess it depends on how good the fishing has been.

Now those guys on those televised fishing shows have a lot of fancy equipment like depth finders, fish finders, water temperature gauges and enough horsepower to stand a boat on one end.

Of course not everyone fishes like that. Like my friend Earl, they just shoot in the creek until they hit a fish. And in his marriage, he says he just gonna keep trying until he gets it right, learning from each each misfire.

Like those guys with all that fancy equipment, a lot of folks put a lot of money into their marriages and they still don’t work. And like my friend Earl, all they have are cane poles and crickets and somehow they continue to share bream beds together for many years.

Now it could be that I’m overthinking this whole thing. But just one more metaphor before I go. Sometimes an angler watches the rod tip bend and hears the line sing. He or she just knows it’s a lunker bass only to discover after fighting it for a while that it’s a mud fish. I could go on about that concept called “catch and release” but too many metaphors could attract the game warden.

(Dwain Walden is editor/publisher of The Moultrie Observer, 985-4545. E-mail: dwain.walden@gaflnews.com)

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